Well! Life continues to be a whirlwind of...EVERYTHING :). I find myself working a steady 65 hours/week with 3.5 hours of commuting to and from work each day - which rounds out to zero time to do anything but work...which, in all honesty, is more than okay with me because: I LOVE WHAT I DO! :)
My case load increases weekly, my clients are all Burmese (Sgway Karen in particular) with a few Iraqis thrown in the mix (the casework team splits the Iraqi community while the other communities are designated to certain caseworkers -- I take all the Burmese clients par example).
I am quickly falling in love with the Burmese, a people of the world I've studied and know about but with whom I have never worked. I am so inspired by them! My first Burmese clients were a recently divorced mother and her two beautiful children. Her bravery is unbelievable. To assist her in learning how to use a stove, toilet, shop at a grocery store (along with doing all the legal registration stuff), is absolutely thrilling. To observe her gain confidence in using her food stamp card etc is just unbelievably fun. Her children have also warmed up to me immensely. The other day they were in the IRC office to see their job developer and I didn't know they were there -- I was barreling toward the door off to some appointment when I heard someone squeal my name! I turned and saw my client and her two kids running down the hallway toward me! She gave me a big hug and her two kids gave me running hi-fives that left the palms of my hands a little pink! "Dani! Hello! How arrrrrre you?!!!" It was one of those moments that makes all the stress of this work completely worth it. :) It's hard to know what this brave woman and her beautiful children have gone through - the terror that forced them from their homes, forced them to run to Thailand and live in a refugee camp made of bamboo for years on end...I see hope in her eyes (as cliche as it sounds). I see a strong desire to SURVIVE and a thirst for life. I aspire to attack my life and the opportunities I've been blessed with in America with as much vigor.
I continue to make in-roads with my Iraqi clients. Their English ability far surpasses that of my Burmese clients so I'm able to get to know them on a more personal level -- deeper than big smiles, thumbs up signs and high fives :). But, I am also gaining their trust, which means they are opening up about the stories of their lives. To hear of the horrifying atrocities my clients have witnessed, experienced, committed....it's very difficult.
I am still trying to find the time to have something of a social life. I am trying to get my rear up on the mountains as much as possible before the snows begin (my first seasonal shift in over a year!). I am still incredibly grateful for wonderful friends who continue to buoy me up, lend support and forgiveness.
Interesting tid-bit: was offered a three-month contract to work with the UNHCR at a refugee camp in Georgia today! Yes, don't worry I freaked out for a good 2 hours upon hearing this news -- but it would begin immediately and (as I mentioned) would only be for three months so...I feel strongly that I need to stay put and build a rapport with the IRC for the time being (as was the counsel I received from my UNHCR friend and contact in Moscow who secured me the job). But, still -- HOW FREAKING COOL would that be?! "Give it a year," he told me on the phone today, "then I want to see you go up, up, up!" :) I'm so blessed to have so much support!
Well, I'm incredibly distracted while writing this -- sorry if it's incoherent. I plan on getting myself back into writing...I'm hearing and learning so much from my clients each day that needs to be shared!!!
Thanks friends and fam for sticking by me. Love you all ('specially the NEELEYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yayayayayayay!!!!)
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3 comments:
"To assist her in learning how to use a stove, toilet, shop at a grocery store . . . "
This reminds me of the TV movie "The Girl Who Spelled Freedom' starring 'Trapper John' from Mash fame, as the father of a family that sponsors a Cambodian family and helps them in the same ways. In particular, the heart rending scene where the wife (Trapper's wife in the movie) realizes the Cambodian mother is saving food from their meals and hiding in their room against some future, expected famine -- something they continually experience in Cambodia. The wife, stunned, but with new understanding, helps by taking them all to the grocery store with her so that women can see that there is no shortage of food and she can stop worrying about the specter of hunger hunting her children. It is a very moving scene.
The pace you describe would vaporize me ;-) But then you are younger and stronger, and far less selfish than I am. Yet, even highly trained athletes pace themselves and rest once in a while. Yes, you can help 1000 people this year if you work 70 hours per week, but if you can only keep that up for 2 years without breaking down that = 2000 people helped. If you pace yourself, working more normal hours, you might be only able to help 500 people a year but you can do it for 5 years = 2500. Clearly, the latter is preferable. This is something I’ve struggled with all my professional life – continually I find people in so-called ‘Management’ that fail to understand this principle and certainly falling afoul of the ‘Mythical Man Month’. No, I’m sorry, you can’t throw more people at the problem, and, No!, you can’t make your limited talent work longer and longer without sub-optimizing the outcome, and horribly altering people’s lives and potential.
“Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;” ;-)
You may need to invest in yourself so you can help even more people (i.e. further your education), but certainly, on-the-ground, actual experience will pay dividends in entering Law School (for instance) in refugee law.
Anyway, only you can decide the ‘center of gravity’, the balancing point, of your life . . . so that in the end, ‘the center –can- hold’. . .
But Go Get’em!. Prove Yeats wrong in his lines:
“The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.”
No one can say you lack conviction.
FWIW (I’m afraid, not much).
Pawley
Patrick's Dad quotes Yeates? And I thought I was the only one that still read Yeates!
And he tells you to slow down and make some time for yourself? Strange, I seem to recall telling you something similar...like yesterday. If two brilliant minds like ours have arrived at that same conclusion it could only be true :P
Also, I must say that the particular Yeates quote Pawley used is true, generally speaking; but you are one of those profound exceptions :)
An interesting, completely unrelated Yeates poem as an aside:
If ever H.G. Wells afflicts you
With white wash on waste walls write: Science--opiate of the suburbs. (I hope I've remember it correctly.) Like I said, completely unrelated, but amazing.
This is wonderful!! The people assigned to your caseload are incredibly lucky to have an IRC agent like you. You are making a significant difference in the lives of these families... how fulfilling and exciting. These families will remember you and your kindness and support for the rest of their lives… Leaves me with a huge grin and warm fuzzies all over. :-)
Keep up the good work and the good fight, Dani!
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